Thursday, January 30, 2014

Of loss and hope

Thank you to those who have reached out to me, prayed for me, since my post on Sunday.

I am humbled yet again by the love of Christ, and His followers.



I spoke of hope.

And truly I am learning more about hope as life goes on.  I understand it more than I did 10 years ago.

And even now, this week, I feel I am seeing new dimensions of it that I did not know existed.

I am a realist.

With a small dose of optimism.  And I think that it is that sprinkling of optimism that is keeping me from swinging way over to the pessimistic side of things.

Because I truly want things to work out, HOPE that things will work out.  But I keep my hand on the shift knob, because I just may have to throw things into a lower gear because well, I'm just hoping for things to work out, but kinda doubt they will.

I hope that made sense to someone.  You may need to go back and read it.  I'll wait.

..........

I think I live most of my life, and approach most circumstances, like that.

So what does that say about hope?

I want to hope.  But if I hope, and things don't go as I hope, I'm crushed.

So....do I just go around expecting the worst?  Why get my hopes up to be dashed to the ground?

I don't think so.  God speaks of hope enough times in His word that I believe He wants us to hope.

Pursue hope.  Grab on to it.

I guess we just have to hope in the right things?

I know I can place hope in the promises of God.  Because I know that He will follow through on those (Hallelujah!)

Heaven

Salvation

Grace

Love

But what about things in this life?  Hope for a better job.  Hope for our children.  Hope for a house.  Hope for a vacation.  Hope for a date night.  Big and small.  Hope can come in all forms and sizes.

We can hope.  But we must also trust.

We can hope.  But we must also be content.

We can hope.  But still know that God has got our back.  And it may stink if those hopes don't quite work out how we, ummmm, hoped.

________________________________________________

This week we discovered a severe water leak in our home.  We stepped inside to find most of the house under at least an inch of water.

 Our kitchen before

Our kitchen now


Our living room, bathrooms, and our bedroom.  
Wish I had a 'before' but can't seem to find those pictures...

Maddie holding the culprit.  Cracked pipe.  That is her 'angry face.


We've been working on our house over the past year.  Hoping to live it in it...someday.

To say this was a setback would put it mildly. 

I think that a part of me has actually gone numb and has not totally processed the whole situation yet.

Probably a coping mechanism.

But I go back to hope.  I feel that my hope has been "deferred" and Proverbs states that that can make the "heart sick."  I don't know what the future holds with this. 

But I do know that God is already there.  And He is the One I can hope in.

May we all find, and place, our hope in Him tonight.

5 comments:

  1. Nichole, I have been praying for you guys! You are strong and I know God will see you through this difficult valley in your life!

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  2. oh my word. that is SO sad. aching & praying for you guys!

    my dad used to always quote that verse in proverbs to us. focusing more on the beginning part. as i've grown older i've found so much hope in the second part - "when the desire comes, it is the tree of life!" :)

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  3. I'm SO sorry, Nichole. You know I'm praying. in what I hope is an encouraging word, nothing lasts forever. this valley truly will end!!
    love ya!

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  4. I don't know that I have ever met you personally, and it has been more than 5 years since I have visited Leo church, however, I do follow your blog through a friend of a friend. I appreciate your authenticity and vulnerability. I rarely comment on blogs, but felt prompted to reach out and encourage you. I resonate with many of your struggles. Hope can a fine line to walk. A line between healthy reliance and crippling dependency. For if we constantly are living in anticipation(hope)of what we want to happen, we may be missing living fully in the moments of the here and now. Yet, we need anticipation(hope)to push us on especially when we are in the valleys. In fact, the bible calls us to hope! I think you said it well when you listed to focus our hope in the things of God. That is solid ground. It isn't always so easy when we are in extended valleys to remember that. One thing God has taught me in my own long valley is to be willing to engage it, not simply endure it. This takes hourly grace and requires me living from a place of uncomfortable rawness. As much as I don't want my valley, and often fight about its endlessness - it has brought a closeness to Jesus that I wouldn't trade. My encouragement to you is to press into it, soak in its strain, for God won't leave you there a minute longer than necessary. And, from it, there will be a richness that comes forth that wouldn't be produced without it. Often our areas of pain and struggle become the very places from which we are able to minister to others. Keep pressing on!

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  5. Paul & Nichole; We know the resilent God has given you and he will see you thru it. Keep the faith and continue to be the family that you are and God will be with you. We love you all and God loves you too... I was so nice to see Everyone Smiling last night with all that stress that life is throwing at you. Keep the FAITH!

    Love Mome and Dad!!

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